So, last week I finally got around to playing Diablo III.
Not sure what took me so long. You would think a game where you get to run around in a dark forest and shoot demons in the face with a crossbow would be right up my alley, right?
Anyway, so I made a Demon Hunter and spent the first 30 minutes running around… pretty much ignoring my quest and instead desperately searching for a pair of pants for my poor character.
Seriously, you start out with a crossbow and stiletto-heel boots (that is NOT forest-suited footwear), but there wasn’t any money left to buy the poor gal some pants?
In the end, I took a pair of pants of a dead soldier in a basement. After I shot all the zombies gnawing on him. Magically, they fit me perfectly (and did not have a trace of zombie guts on them)!
I still would have liked a jacket, but I feel like I was just being demanding at that point.
After getting my pants, and shooting a bunch more zombies with arrows I’m not sure where I was keeping, I was off to save an old man. Luckily, as someone who has watched way too many BlizzCon livestreams over the years, and played way too much Heroes of the Storm, I knew this dude and was fairly sure he wouldn’t be zombified by the time I got to him.
But I was also fairly sure that if he went all “Stay a while and listen”, I might just shoot him in the face for the hell of it.
Perhaps luckily for him, I didn’t find the old coot before it was time for bed (real life bosses do not accept “monster hunting” as an excuse for why you didn’t get enough sleep to do your day job). I did, however, find more zombies. Soooo many zombies. And bats. And more zombies.
You get the point.
Long story short, I got my pants and I’m getting way too fond of this crossbow. Pretty much the only thing keeping me from shooting everyone in the face, friend or enemy, is because the game won’t allow me to.