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Spoilers, Beware! – My Thoughts on the Game of Thrones Season 8 Premiere

Game of Thrones Arya Season 8

Okay, I have a lot of stuff to say about Winterfell, the new episode of Game of Thrones, and I’m not enough of an asshole to do it on social media where spoilers can creep up on people.

So I’m gonna do it here where I can warn people properly.

Which means I’m just going to be rambling for a bit, to make sure the spoilery bits don’t end up in various post previews.

La la la la la la…

I think I have given people enough time to flee now, right?

Okay!

First off…

Stop Thinking With Your Dick, Jon!

Seriously, Daenerys is acting like an entitled bitch from minute 1, all spiteful because the Northerners don’t immediately fall at her feet, yet Jon thinks SANSA is the one being unreasonable? Sure, Daenerys’s beautiful and willing to sleep with you, Zombie Boy, but Sansa has some very real concerns about not being able to feed her army and her dragons. Also, the “my dragon eats whatever they want”-comment was a not-even-slightly-disguised threat.

Get it together, Jon!

(Also, I loved the character development for both Sansa and Arya expressed in Arya’s comment, “She’s the smartest person I know.”)

Qyburn’s Cockblocking Game is STRONG

Not really a lot to add here, but I just loved how calmly Qyburn commented on one of Bronn’s whores having pox.

And the following conversation created a fantastic ‘Dun, dun, duuuuun’-moment, as I honestly can’t tell what choice Bronn will make…

(…if he doesn’t die from pox first.)

Yara is Still a Badass

As cool as Theon’s rescue was up until that moment, I would probably still have headbutted him if I had been in Yara’s place.

She also gets one of the best, in my humble opinion, quotes of the episode:

“What is dead may never die. But kill the bastards, anyway.”

Is No One Going to Talk About How These Aren’t Dragons…?

Everyone keeps going on and on about Targaryens and their dragons, but all I could think about during the ‘Jon’s a Horrible Driver’-scene was how these are wyverns, not dragons.

Yes yes, I know I’m being that person, and an incorrigible geek on top of it, but I wish that one, just one, person had pointed out to the design team prior to production that dragons have four legs, not two.

Of course, it doesn’t make it any less awkward just because it’s two wyverns watching you have sex with their “mother”…

I Will Never Not Love Arya and the Hound

“You left me to die.”

“First I robbed you.”

Let’s be honest, all the Arya reunion scenes were the best thing about the episode, but Arya and the Hound bitching at each other never gets old.

Daenerys, Queen of Bad First Impressions

The meeting between Sam and Daenerys started so well… and stayed that way for all of 30 seconds.

Good on you, Sam. First time meeting a queen and YOU weren’t the one making it awkward!

(See, this is why people don’t like you, Dany!)

Bloody Hell, That Ending!

Not sure which was the worst cliffhanger… The symbol made out of severed limbs (that was totally the Targaryen insignia, right? Right?!) on fire, or Jaime locking eyes with Bran in his wheelchair.

Beautiful symbolism to have the first episode of the last season make Jaime face the boy he crippled in the first episode of the first season! The look of horror in Jaime’s eyes is also another amazing display of character development. This episode had a lot of them and it was probably what I liked best about it.

Game of Thrones Fire Symbol TargaryenGame of Thrones Jaime Season 8


So yeah, these were the thoughts burning on my mind during the first episode of Game of Thrones Season 8.
What about you guys?

19 thoughts on “Spoilers, Beware! – My Thoughts on the Game of Thrones Season 8 Premiere

  1. “Stop Thinking With Your Dick, Jon!”

    This is pretty much the theme of GoT since Ygritte died.

    1. I watched all the other episodes with a friend, and we had a running commentary about all the shit that could have been avoided if 80% of the male characters had been castrated from the beginning.

      1. I think you might be estimating a little low.

        1. Probably… I was trying to not to come off too much as “Radical Feminist”, but then again, the characters themselves show a startling fascination with cutting off manhoods.
          (Did you notice how the very first dialogue of the season was a eunuch joke…?)

          1. It was a eunuch way to start a season.

            1. I should make some kind of user agreement that forbids puns on my website…

              1. Oh. Oh no. You really shouldn’t read some of my blog posts then. Or my WIP when it becomes a book.

                1. I punch my friends on a regular basis because of puns.
                  It’s frustrating when it’s happening on the internet and I can’t do anything!

                  1. I love puns. They make my heart happy if they’re done well. One of the characters in my WIP shares this love, though it doesn’t come out as much in her in this book as it will in future books in the series.

                    1. I can tolerate a good pun.
                      But I used to have a friend who would constantly make bad puns.
                      USED to.

  2. Wait, don’t we all think with our dicks? Maybe I should just speak for myself. Shuffles off from whence he came.

    1. All the men in Game of Thrones definitely does (except the ones who has had them cut off. Those are usually the men who don’t get into nearly as much trouble as their brethren)

      I don’t personally have a dick to think with, so I try to use my brain instead.

      1. I feel sorry for Theon Greyjoy. Sometimes.

        Yeah, Vaginas just don’t have the cognitive ability that penises do. I’m sure you’re all very jealous…

        1. Oh, yeah, definitely.
          I mean, Freud said we were, so it has to be true.

          It must be truly magical to have an exposed area where a single kick will render you useless for the foreseeable future.

          1. Lol. It does seem to be a massive design flaw. Not unlike the Death Star.

            1. It always seemed like an afterthought to me.
              “Shit, we forgot the genitals! Quick, sew on some of the scraps!”

              1. It always amused me that we are supposedly created in gods image. Wouldn’t god have a more efficient delivery system? But I get what you’re saying… human eye, amazing. Human ear… amazing. Human penis… weird looking thing tacked on as an afterthought.

                1. And yet they claim it was the woman who was made by spare parts…

  3. […] was asked for another commentary post after I covered “Winterfell” last week. And who am I to refuse the three people in the world who actually appreciate my sense of […]

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