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The Bookish Owl – The Amazing Maurice and His Educated Rodents by Terry Pratchett

The Amazing Maurice and His Educated Rodents Terry Pratchett Owl

Yep. I’m reading a book about a talking cat.

Nothing wrong with that, per se, but I went straight from a rather gritty Witcher novel to this, so I’m getting a bit of literary whiplash.

The book in question is The Amazing Maurice and His Educated Rodents by Terry Pratchett, the first Discworld book to be aimed at children. But, of course, it wouldn’t be all that unusual to see talking cats and tap-dancing rats in the novels he wrote for adults, either…

But I must say I didn’t expect this amount of cannibalism and people getting stabbed in the eye with frozen herrings in a children’s book.

Honestly, I don’t think I ever expect anyone to be stabbed in the eye with a frozen herring when reading a book, but that’s besides the point.

The Amazing Maurice and His Educated Rodents Terry Pratchett Owl

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Ghostly Scream – Excerpt (Chapter 48)

“You, with the wings,” the captain said, nodding to Seymour in case the half-breed angel was unsure who he was addressing. “Our wards will only signal us once the demons enter into a mile radius of our location. We could use someone to scout the area and hopefully give us more of a warning.”

“Bringing us back to the aforementioned wings,” Seymour finished for him, looking up at the sky. “Good thing few demons can fly.”

“Neither can most humans,” Orrell said, shooting the other man a pointed look. “I’m not going to ask what kind of misfired experiment you are if you put those feathery appendages to good use and cover us from the air.”

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Witcher School, LARP Characters, and Why I Am Screwed

Witcher School logo

Witcher School logoYes, you’re finally getting a post that’s not about owls or cosplay, and yet it’s STILL terribly geeky. Bear with me.

I’m going to Poland this week to enroll in Witcher School. This is a huge LARP event where people from all over the world spends 3 days at a castle, acting out a story based on the Witcher books by Andrzej Sapkowski and the popular Witcher video games. We’re talking more than a hundred players as well as a huge crew of organizers who’ll play instructors, monsters and other cool characters over the course of the event, where we’ll be completely secluded from the modern world. The players will get lessons in fencing, archery, survival and alchemy, and whatever else they might need to become experienced monster hunters.

Witcher wolf medallion logo

I did a bit of LARPing (“Live-action Roleplaying” to those unfamiliar with the lingo) as a teenager, but this will be my first time as an adult and of course I’m jumping in at the deep end.

When signing up for the event, we all got a form to fill out. A lot of the info was so that the organizers could make a custom character for each of us. We had to fill out prior skills, wishes and ideas for our characters’ backstories, etc..

As I have next to no physical skills, and since there wasn’t a box for that, I just checked “from a noble family” under the character background section, knowing that, as a petite woman with noodle arms who gets winded going up more than one flight of stairs, I would have trouble believably playing someone from a rough background. I figured a backstory as a pampered noblewoman would give me some excuses when struggling to swing a sword, so I didn’t specify anything else for my character.

Let’s just say that… backfired.

I got my character sheet last week and the organizers did respect my only wish. My character, Eydis of Clan Tordarroch, is indeed nobility.

Skellige nobility.

To everyone not familiar with the Witcher universe: They basically made me a viking.

I barely weigh more than a hundred pounds soaking wet, and my friends accidentally injure me on a regular basis just by hugging me. I’m also not a fan of the cold. Despite my Scandinavian blood, I’m the least viking-y person you’ll ever meet.

Also, I’m horrible at accents, and all the Skellige characters in Witcher 3 have Irish accents.

Don’t get me wrong. While reading my character sheet, I immediately fell in love with Eydis as a character. I’m just in for a hell of a challenge bringing her to life.

At least they made her bitchy and brutally honest. Now THAT I can do.

Photos by 5 Żywiołów and CD Project Red.

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The Bookish Owl – Sword of Destiny by Andrzej Sapkowski

Sword of Destiny Andrzej Sapkowski owl

Since I’ll be going to Poland next week to attend Witcher School, I thought it only fitting that I read the second book in Andrzej Sapkowski’s Witcher series, Sword of Destiny.

(Book 3, 4 and 5 have already been packed for the flight)

It’s always good to read up on your lore. It probably won’t prevent me from getting my ass kicked by leshens, basilisks and whatever fellow Witcher adept I might piss off, but at least I will have brushed up on my Witcher curse word vocabulary.

I’m going to be calling someone a ‘whoreson’ before it’s all over, even if it kills me.

I have also started playing Gwent. Just in case I need another excuse to start cursing at people.

None of this post will have made any sense to people who haven’t played the Witcher games, so here’s a photo of my grumpy owl, since I know that’s why most of you are here:

Sword of Destiny Andrzej Sapkowski owl

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Quiet Whisper – Excerpt (Chapter 41)

“I’m a big girl,” Selissa said dryly. “You don’t need to hold my hand.”

“I wasn’t talking about me,” Bane said. “You’re taking Vael with you.”

Vael let out a hiss and Selissa found herself sharing the sentiment. “I’m doing what? She’s not going to watch my back, she’s going to stab me in it!”